Come on Virigina, don't let me wait.

I have a good friend who just got engaged.  I also have a group of girlfriends who all of us got married within a year or so of each other (yes, we met on a wedding website, but we are now super close).   The topic of sex on your wedding night came up.

We didn't have sex on our wedding night -- mainly because I forgot to print our boarding passes for our honeymoon.

And we didn't have a printer.

And I didn't realize you can print them at the airport.

So at 2 a.m. the night of our wedding, we drove to Kinkos so I could print them.

With my veil, sparkly headband, tshirt and fleece pants on.

Good times.

We did, however, have sex that morning, as yes we spent the night before our wedding together (GASP!), we had premarital sex (GASP!), and we are heathens.

I have a couple friends who waited till their wedding night to get it on.  (Cue "Let's Get it On").

Mostly their reasons are religious based, and that's fine.  If you've been here before, you know I'm not a religous person.  It also seems most of their husbands felt the same way.

But it also reminds me that when I first heard the line "Come on Virgina, don't let me wait" I had no idea with Mr. Billy Joel was talking about.  I also didn't catch the irony of "Virginia."

Though I was raised Catholic, I am far from it.  I am not atheist, but I am not religious in any way.  I don't see sex as a religious act.  I don't see it as something to "save" for your husband.  I don't see anything wrong with people who do see it this way, it's just not my style.

I guess I'd rather laugh with the sinners than cry with the saints. :)

Sometimes, you just have to eat your grapes.

PJ and Maggie are 18.5 months apart.  Sometimes this causes a bit of chaos, a bit of rivalry, a bit of both wanting Mommy all to themselves.  Sometimes there's hitting, kicking, hair pulling.

But most of the time?  There's love, caring, affection, and laughter.

Yesterday, before leaving for the sitter, I put some grapes in a baggie.  PJ always picks the mixed grapes when we go to store -- green for him, purple for Maggie.  So I put a mixture of both. 

I was putting them in my purse when he saw them.

"I take the grapes, Mommy."

"Okay, bud. Remember to share with Maggie."

"Maggie, do you want a grape?"

"Uh-huh!"

He hands her a (purple) grape and I get them out and settled in the car. As we're driving, I hear

"More grapes Maggie?"

I look in the mirror and see Maggie shake her head feverishly.  And then I see PJ reach in the bag, take out a purple grape, and stretch his arm across as far as he can to get to Maggie.  She notices, and reaches her arm across.

"REACH Maggie!"

Finally, their hands meet.

"YAY!! Maggie you got the grape!"

Maggie dissolves in giggles and eats her grape.  PJ takes a green one.

This occurred the entire time to the sitter.  Which is only 10 minutes, but it was by far the best 10 minutes of my day.

In 20 years or so, I hope they still reach to each other.  I hope they are close, that they lean on each other, that they laugh together, that they love each other.

Sibling love is something I never had.  I am so glad that they do.

Things I said I'd never do...

Now that I've been a mom for three years, I laugh at the thing I said I'd never do.  Or would do and never did.

1.  I will NEVER allow my child to sleep in my bed.

Dude.  If said child is only going to stay asleep if they are next to you in your bed, and everyone will get to continue sleeping, guess what?  Kid is sleeping in my bed.

2.  I will not make separate meals for my kids.

Um.  I want my child to eat.  It takes 2 minutes to make grilled cheese.

3.  I will always make sure my child's hair is brushed before we leave the house.

Sometimes this happens.  Sometimes is doesn't.  Sometimes my own hair doesn't get brushed.

4.  I will not use candy as a bribe.

What?  If I give you this reese's, sucker, m&m, you'll stop crying?  Here you go!

5.  I will strictly enforce timeouts. 

You sat there for ten seconds.  yeah, that's good enough.

6.  I will not buy my kid something in the store just to shut them up.

So I can spend $1 and have a quiet, peaceful shopping trip, or save the $1 and have you screaming and struggling for freedom while everyone else gives me dirty looks?  That, my friends, is a dollar WELL SPENT.

7.  I will never have to leave a restaurant because a child is misbehaving.

Let's just say there's certain restaurants we won't be going to anytime soon since they seem to be prone to the freakout.

I am sure there are more, but today, this is what I got. 

What are some of yours?

Hardest thing....

I've figured it out.

The hardest thing to do as a parent.

It's not the lack of sleep. It's not teething. It's not breastfeeding.

Oh no, my friends.

It's fricking POTTY TRAINING.

If I could pay someone to potty train PJ, I would.

He's doing pretty good.  I got some nifty app that plays "I'm a big kid now!" and gives him a sticker when he pees.  Friday, Saturday and Sunday, I took him to pee every half hour.

He had no pee accidents.  He also never told us he had to pee.

Poop?  Forget it.  He poops and then says I pooped!

I tried to put him on the toliet, but no go.

We've ruined three pairs of underwear -- underwear is not that important that I'm going to spend an hour trying to clean pooped stained underwear that is all over - but that's good, I guess.

He was dry last night.  He hasn't peed in the car when we've left (very briefly this weekend).

People keep telling me it will just click.

I sure hope so.

I also taught him how to pee outside.  In the grass.  So now when we are outside, he says "I pee in grass Mommy."

Klassy right here.

Our sitter is continuing. 

It's going to be okay, right?

Happy 3rd Birthday, PJ!

PJ turns 3 tomorrow.  Chances are I won't blog since I'm taking the day off to spend with him.  So here is his tribute, today.

Dear PJ,

Happy 3rd Birthday to my little guy.  I cannot believe you are three years old.  I remember so vividly the moment I saw you for the first time.  I can feel the tears welling up in my eyes when I held you for the first time and you looked at me.  I have never been so happy.

You made me a mama.  You were beautiful and perfect.  You had dark hair, and looked just like your daddy.  I couldn't believe how gorgeous you were. 

You have grown up so much.  You are such a boy.   You get dirty, you play rough, you run.  You love to play sports, especially golf, and you can identify every Chicago sports team.  You are independent, but you still need your mama.  You are smart.  You amaze me with the things you know, the things you do, the things you say.

You are loving and caring.  When you see that I am sad, you ask "What's wrong Mama?"  and you give me a hug and a kiss, complete with a pat on the back.  You tell me "No cry Mama" when I cry in front of you, which I try not to do.  Although you are sometimes not so nice to your sister, you take pride in being her big brother.  You stand up for her when other kids are mean to her. You tell me if she's crying and you hug her and try to make her feel better. She loves you so much.  I know, even so young, she looks up to you.

Everyday that passes I love you more.  I am amazed at how at 3 years old, your personality is without question.  You sometimes want to do everything yourself, and sometimes, you want mama to do it.  You're a picky eater, but I'll let you slide. 

I'll never forget when you were a baby and I'd rock you to sleep in my arms.  When I'd gaze in your crib and just watch you sleep, your sweet, angelic perfect face peacefully in dreamland.  And while I don't rock you to sleep anymore, sometimes I still sneak in to watch you sleep, and see that sweet, angelic perfect face -- albiet, older -- still peacefully in dreamland.  Your demands for hugs and kisses make me melt.  And hearing you say I love you is the greatest part of my day.

I love you so much, my sweet son, my first born.  I love every last bit of you, from the top of your head to the tip of your toes.  You're spirit, intelligence, sense of humor and pure joy inspire me every day to make sure to appreciate the day.  You've made me stop and remember not to sweat the small stuff, to be grateful for what I have, and to realize that at the end of the day, all that matters is that I have a family that can't wait to see me.

I love you, Patrick John.  Happy Birthday baby.

Tuesday's Things That Annoy Me

This was brought up in a group of friends, and I realized, it kind of annoys me.  And I still love the friends that don't agree.

1.  Bike Helmets

Seriously. If you are a mountain cyclist, or if you are riding on an expressway, or decide to dart into oncoming traffic, by all means, wear a helmet.  But my three year old?  Who's going to be 12 inches off the ground?  Who if he fell off the slide in our backyard would have a longer fall?  Who if he fell off his own BED would have a longer fall? Give me a break.  I rode my bike.  A lot.  I didn't wear a helmet, or knee pads, or shoulder pads, or whatever the hell.  I had friends that thought it was a good idea to ride their bike up a hill and them come flying down the hill, only to tumble off and roll halfway down.  If your kid needs a helmet for a bike, might as well make sure he wears one at the park too.   (I realize people may disagree with me, but alas, this is how I feel).

2.  People Who Bitch About the Weather No Matter what it is.

A couple weeks ago - the beginning of MARCH -- it was like 65 degrees in Chicago, but it was windy.

Said in whiny, annoying, make me want to punch you in the jugular voice "But it's sooo windy."  It is fucking MARCH.  It could be 20 degrees and soooo windy.  STFU.

It's been in the 80s or close to it for a week now.  "But now it's going to be soooo hot in July."  Yes, July, is fucking summer, douche bag.

This same person will then be all "It's soooo cold" in January.

3.  The Person Who Talks During a Concert -- the entire time

Why did you pay $60 to come to a concert if you were going to yell into the ear of the person next to you for the entire concert?  Here's a newsflash, moron -- put the album on your IPOD, and sit on your couch, and talk to the person next to you. You saved $60, the beer is cheaper, and you don't have to wait in line to pee.

4.  The Person Who Answers the Phone at the Pizza place.

When I say "I'd like to place an order for delivery." and you say "What would you like?" And I tell you and then you say "Pick up or delivery?" I want to reach through the phone and bang your head off the desk repeatedly.

5.  Left red turn arrow

Why can't I turn if no one is coming?? WHY???  Stupidest thing ever.  If NO ONE IS COMING, and I have the advantage of turning so I don't have to wait for this light, let me fucking turn.  Chances are I'm going to get stuck behind some moron that doesn't know green means go and I am going to have to sit through a second red turn arrow.

These are the days...

This weekend was absolutely awesome.  It was near or above 80 (that's right 80) in Chicago in March.

Friday we had a play date at McDonalds with one of my oldest and best friends (and one of my favorite people).

Saturday we cleaned in the morning. Then we met my stepdad for lunch at Red Robin (yum) where BOTH kids were very well behaved.  Then we got home and put Daddy to work.

My mom always wanted to buy the kids big outside toys.  And this was the one she got them for Christmas.

The bouncy house in the backyard was a gift a couple years back.  Yes, we have our very own bouncy house.

Daddy also had to put together Maggie's cozy coupe, because it wasn't fair for PJ just to have one.  And of course, PJ had to get his hammer and help Daddy.

Sunday we went to the zoo.  It was awesome.  Again, the kids were super well behaved (not sure what is going on here).  The best part was on the way home, completely unprompted, PJ says

"I had fun at the zoo Mom."

Heart = melted.

Then he proceeded to tell me he wanted to "go have fun in the backyard."

And that we did. 

Maggie's first pigtails. She needs a bit more hair, but still. She's fricking adorable.

PJ, immediately after I said "PJ, do NOT climb in the water table.  You're too big."

And seriously folks.  It does NOT get cuter than this.  It really, really doesn't.