Boys will be Boys

So PJ has bruises on his leg, the side of his eye, his head.  I don't worry though.  He's a BOY!  Boys do things like this and he never cries for more than a second, and I know he's having fun, and figuring out his world and learning.

He's also discovered his penis.  Yes that's right.  Every time the little weiner is exposed BAM!  Playing, pulling, tugging, CRACKING UP about it.  It's actually quite amusing.   The joy of playing with your penis starts young apparently.  He's also discovered he wants to play with the baby in the mirror (him).  He waves to himself, laughs.  It's really fucking adorable actually.

I'm 15 weeks pregnant.  I feel like this is taking FOREVER.  I have a doctor appointment on Thursday, and I feel like my last one was MONTHS ago.  I realize come October I am going to be saying how fast it went and all that jazz, but right now it is DRAGGING.  I feel flutters here and there, no major kicks or anything yet though.   I am really anxious to find out if it's a boy or girl (I think it's a boy, but still).  I feel like I can't really buy anything till we know -- which is dumb because most of what we need is stuff we'll get gender neutral anyway, except for clothes.  But I feel like if we buy it ahead of time it will be weird.  I really don't know why.

And now..

The Peri Bottle

I mentioned the peri bottle in an earlier post, but now I am going to give it rightful place in the things you will love after you give birth.
The peri bottle probably holds about 6-8 ounces of water and is squeezable with a top like a water bottle that you pop up to drink out of.  They will give this to you (or they should) immediately before you pee the first time after you give birth.  You will fill the bottle with warm (as warm as you can stand) water.   Then, after you pee, you will squirt the gloriousness of this warm water all over your vagina, lips, etc.  Because you want to clean any gunk off there (read:  blood) and make sure you don't get an infection because THAT would suck.

Use all the water.  Why not? It feels good, and you don't really want to be wiping at this time, no matter how angel soft your toliet paper might be.  Use it until you have stopped bleeding for a week, and until wiping doesn't sound like you might die if you do it. And keep it around -- you might never know what else it would be good for.

So one year ago today...

I came home from the hospital.   For those of you pregnant ladies or future pregnant ladies, a couple tips on the day you come home from the hospital.

First, do not,  under any circumstance, allow people to be at your house less than two hours after you get there.  TELL YOUR HUSBAND THIS.   My husband did not realize that the last thing I wanted to do when I got home was have people there.   But I didn't tell him so lo and behold, MIL and SIL and nephew show up within minutes after us arriving home.  I wanted to shower.   Hang out with my son and husband in our home.  Nope.  I did insist my MIL bring lunch, but still.  TELL YOUR HUSBAND BEFORE LEAVING THE HOSPITAL THAT NO ONE CAN COME OVER TILL LATER.

Second, while you are in the hospital, have your husband go get the following:

• Tucks Pads
• The largest size ALWAYS pads, the next smallest, and the next smallest.
• Any snack that you think you will enjoy (I was hooked on graham crackers).
• The softest toilet paper he can find (cashmere, if they make it).
• Your favorite beverage
• If your baby takes a pacifier, make him go buy 5-6 of the pacifiers the hospital gives, and have them in every room in your house, the car, and your purse.

He might have to suck it up.  Be DESCRIPTIVE when it comes to the pads.  Tell him EXACTLY what is on the package, what colors it is, etc.  Don't leave anything out or he will undoubtedly come home with Depends.

Third, if someone asks what you need, tell them food.  My MIL made us three meals and it was fantastic.  John just had to heat it up.   If 10 people ask you what you need, and they each make you one dish, you are set for a week.  Trust me.

Fourth, and this is the big one.  If you are breastfeeding, and someone is visiting DO NOT get up and go to another room.  This is YOUR home, this is YOUR child, and you need to feed your baby where it works for you.  If they don't like it, THEY can go in a different room.