Spaghetti is a good morning snack.

At least it is when you are pregnant.  Because who's gonna tell you NOT to eat spaghetti at 10 a.m.?

PJ walked all the way from his room to the front door this morning (holding mama's hand, of course).   He's so close, he just needs to have a little more confidence in himself, I think.   He also loves strawberries (not sure how those two things are related, they probably are not).

I hate that lately I am consumed with HATING that I can't be home with him.  It's really bothering me lately, and I am not sure why it is bothering me SO MUCH so OFTEN.  It's always bothered me, but it's all I can think about while I am at work these few weeks.  Is it because it's nicer out?  Or because he's having so much fun playing now?  I don't know, but I do know that I hate it with a passion.  Damn women's lib.   I would be perfectly happy cleaning, cooking, and taking care of the kids while John made the money.   Guess we're gonna have to win that $252 million powerball.

I think, because it's all I can really do, is that after maternity leave is over, I am going to start looking for a job in the burbs.  In the Oak Brook/Downers Grove/Burr Ridge area.  I don't want a raise.  I want to be able to leave the house at 745 for a job that starts at 8:30, and be home by 5 for a job I get out of at 4:30.  I want to be able to leave at 3 p.m. and not wait for 30 minutes for a train, instead being home in 30 minutes.  I'd even be willing to take a small paycut if it meant no more commuting by train and waiting for bullshit.   I'd have to pay K&E back some tuition reimbursement most likely, but not too much.  We'd figure it out.  I might actually not apply for any more after this quarter so the amount I have to pay back would be minimal -- only like $1000.  Which sucks, but would be worth it to be gone from 745 to 5 instead of 7 to 530.

Today's edition of what happens after the baby comes out.

The first time you pee.
Okay, so my only experience with this is after having an epidural.    You won't really be able to stand/walk on your own.   So hopefully your husband will help you to the bathroom, which is hopefully not that far away.  The nurse will most likely have handed him a peri bottle  (a small bottle that you fill with warm water with a squirty top -- remember this, it will become your new love) filled with hot water, a huge pad, and some -- wait for it -- mesh panties (more on that stuff later, this is strictly about peeing).

When you go to sit down to pee, you will be instructed to take the bottle and squirt it all over your vagina, the lips, etc -- don't TOUCH it, just squirt.  It will feel WONDERFUL.  Maybe even a little orgasmic. Don't wipe.  The water is enough.  You don't want to wipe.   What you need to be ready for though, is what you will see (and what your husband will see) when you stand up.

There's going to be A LOT of blood in that toilet.  A LOT.  Like  I-just-killed-a-small-animal-over-the-toilet amount of blood.  This is TOTALLY normal.  Don't freak out.  Your after peeing toilet bowl is going to look like this for AWHILE.  Some will probably drip down your leg.  Have your husband  wipe this up for you.  He just saw you give birth, he can handle this.